This is the only recipe I will ever share. I don’t cook and I don’t care to learn how. I can make Hooch S’mores which are very versatile in that you can eat them for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. They make great snacks as well! I learned to make them camping in the Alaskan wilderness. The one disappointment my mom and I found camping in the middle of nowhere is that there are no bars. Not even dive pubs. Nothing. It’s like a dry wilderness. No wonder the bears are so grouchy. As we spent a week traveling from one magnificent Alaskan campsite to the next, we made finding the local liquor store a priority. One night there was talk of making S’mores. Previously, I would have considered S’mores the perfect food, except they were like the Alaskan wilderness–hoochless. Being ambitious women, we decided we should take our s’mores to the next level.
What you need:
Hooch (We used Jim Beam, because it came in a plastic bottle instead of glass. But I would bet rum would make an excellent substitution here.)
- Taste the hooch. Make sure it is worthy of the other ingredients.
- Bore a small hole in the marshmallow and carefully pour approx. 6 drops of hooch into the hole. The longer you have been hoochless the more exciting those 6 drops will seem.
- Eat a piece of chocolate.
- Put the marshmallow on the stick. Three of the six drops will spill out of your carefully crafted marshmallow grail. Don’t panic! Stealthily lick the drops off the side of the marshmallow or your hands. You learn to waste nothing when you are in survival mode.
- Take a swig of hooch to calm your nerves.
- Hold marshmallow over the fire.
- Place a piece of chocolate on the graham cracker.
- While dangling another piece of chocolate in your mouth, put the toasted marshmallow on the cracker.
- Top with another graham cracker.
- Take another swig. This much cooking will make you thirsty.